Issa and Molly from Insecure are a mirror of some of my college friendships

Dear readers,

I’ve caught up with HBO’s series Insecure, by Issa Rae. I must admit that my friends were right in telling me to get on it, because Issa’s adventures are pretty much some kind of material I can get along with.

Insecure is the story of an African American millennial named Issa who lives in Los Angeles, where she has a solid group of friends and a job in community service, which she would be able to enjoy more if the environments she comes across with would be filled with more empathic and understanding people. Issa is a vulnerable but resilient woman, who wants to be loved passionately and respectfully. The show has now four seasons, with a fifth one on its way. Usually the episodes last 30 minutes, produced by a team mostly made by African Americans or brown professional creatives. The diversity and the intersectionality of the topics discussed are very much appreciated in this show by me, a brown woman in the creative and media fields.

In Insecure, Issa’s best friend is Molly, a successful lawyer in the Los Angeles scene. Molly differs from Issa in temperament and lifestyles. Molly is money-oriented and a workaholic, whereas Issa likes taking her time to figure out what she likes or not. Molly is in search of the perfect love and uses her dating life as an escape to not solve her inner issues. Issa enjoys her dating life, but she frequently gets into complicated situations due to her insecurities and weaknesses. Even though their differences are outstanding, Molly and Issa are chosen sisters who compliment each other. However, when life gets in the way and pushes new trajectories, the two women face reality.

In the series, Issa and Molly are in their late 20s and early 30s. They have already been over their post graduate years, full of novelty in adulthood and fresh habits to start from scratch. Issa and Molly are grown women who, under bigger circumstances they couldn’t control, face their own differences and wonder if it’s worth it to keep such friendship. In the episode Lowkey Done, Issa feels lonely while trying to figure out if her friendship with Molly is still a real one or an expired one.

Despite the age difference, I have lived and I am currently living this situation with a few friends from college. Now that we have all graduated, are we going to stay in touch? Was college just a bump or are we going to keep our connection even in the midst of young adulthood? While I was watching the last two episodes of Insecure I was seeing in Molly’s and Issa’s relationship a reflection of some of my dearest college friendships. We have touched the final destination and now we’ll either keep in touch or just vanish our existences from each other, no matter how harsh it sounds.

I’ve decided to allocate some space on my blog and Instagram feed to connect with illustrators and digital artists, who are willing to collaborate with me to bring up colors and style under and in front of my eye. I like to see how others perceive me because I think it’s both fun and educational to see yourself in different ways. During college I haven’t had many radical changes of personalities, but my style and lifestyle have changed exponentially. These changes were most of the times responses to what I was living during that period of time or to the people I was around with. After four years I can say that I’ve experienced a vast spectrum of styles and tastes, which expanded my preferences a great deal. I had to say many NOs to keep firm the best and most vital parts of my lifestyle as well as to add richer and fuller human connections in my existence: many friends had to come and go. Did it hurt? Yes. Was it worthy? Most of the times, yes.

Insecure shows that part of the city of angels that is often times underrated in movies or tv shows. Unfortunately out of the many places she mentions in the shows, I only know the most famous ones. My first trip to Los Angeles was a good one, but it was just a tasteful introduction to the most glamorous and golden city of the West Coast: I’m sure that next time will be different and with another mindset, into adulthood. Issa’s directions and production does a good job in depicting such a complex city like Los Angeles.

What is incredible about Issa is her ability to turn her initial web-series project, Awkward Black Girl, into a national broadcasted tv show. I admire her for that. Her hard work has paid off immensely way: nothing but an inspiration, especially in the black community. It’s incredible to think that she was one of the first black creatives I’ve subconsciously come across on my own, outside the college’s walls, during freshmen year.

The reality depicted in Insecure’s dynamics between Issa and Molly is significative and speaks volume, especially between young women. Our behaviors can be so engulfed in matters that hurt us, but we don’t realize the consequences until we face them once and for all. When we’re given an ultimatum in a friendship everything can change either for the best or for the worst. At the end of the end, you’ll always still have yourself, but if you happen to close that meaningful bond, what happens next? Will your choices save or destroy you?

As long as you stay true to yourself and are comfortable within your own peace, everything will work in your favor. But once disrespect and lack of communication creeps in, it’s time to move on and accept what a certain friendship has been throughout the years: it served a purpose, it was cyclic, and it has come to its end. As the most perfect and complete geometric figure, it ended in a circle penned by a single track.

Can’t wait to see what happens next on Insecure. Meanwhile, I can’t wait to see what will happen to my next platonic relationships, which ones will be worth to keep and those who are destined to be fade away.


the curly flower

2 Replies to “Issa and Molly from Insecure are a mirror of some of my college friendships”

    1. It is scary, but at the same time it allows you to see who are your true friends too. It makes you think lots!


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